"Sometimes I spray lacquer in my mouth just to feel something."

"Hello everyone, I thought I would leave a review to show my great excitement to play with my new toy. It looks so crazy style. Unfortunately the ramp is downstairs and my mom has grounded me for a week for biting her. I also cannot sneak down because my father has set up a state of the art mechanism at my doors and windows that can detect very small foot movements and even heartrate. I am not allowed forks anymore."

"This ramp have the extreme verticality, break my board many pieces shatter. Do not like, do not recommend. If look for ramp no steep buy 黑河坡道. Yarnbody make ramp for idiots. 去你妈的 Yarnbody 我希望你孤独终老."

"10/10, i chew it on it for hours on end when i get off work. Sometimes looking forward to suckling on my yarnbody quarterpipe is the only thing that gets me out of bed. My mouth is bloody red, swollen, and my teeth have been reduced to small nubs, yet i still can’t get enough. Seriously… i can’t thank you enough yarnbody."

"Ok, can someone tell me WHY THE FUCK i got a box of wood peices, nails, glue, sandpaper, spray paint and A WHOLE BELT SANDER instead of my ramp. FYM DIY LEDGE KIT??? Just give me my 50$ back man i dont want no problems."

"Me gusta Yarn Ramp, muchas gracias Yarnbody!"

"Yarnbody ramps start as microscopic-scanned hardwood, then get crushed under hyper-tonnage aerospace presses while vacuum-injected resin bonds the fibers under electromagnetic calibration. Boards are flash-frozen, heat-forged, phase-stabilized, then carved by atomic-tolerance CNC rigs with diamond cutters and inert-gas cooling. Holes are drilled by servo systems recalibrating thousands of times per second, then each ramp is plasma-cured, spectrally scanned, stress-tested, and destroyed if it’s off by even a nanometer."

"Wow… just wow… every since i got this ramp i put on 40 lbs and i’m what most would regard a healthy, active man. Why must you betray me yarnbody i wished nothing but the best for your business and you make me fat?"

"Skater over 40 here. Hey, so i’m a skater over 40. Wife doesn’t like when i do fingerplants and other bad ass manuvers on my yarnbody miniramp in the kitchen, why can’t she understand i have needs too? Jeez i’m a skater over 40 goddamnit. Doesn’t she know us skaters over 40 need time to ourselves aswell."

"I wanted so badly to enjoy this ramp… but… like everything else in my life this has brought me great pain and disappointment. DO NOT BUY if you like your respiratory system because what i received was a 3ft x 3ft air-sealed box containing Hydrogen Fluoride. Yarnbody I want you to know that i’ve alerted the authorities and you WILL pay.**EDIT: WHY CANT I ONE STAR???**"